Baby Blues?

This post is a snippet from some writing I'm doing for a class I'm taking. I chose post- partum depression as my topic. Today it occurred to me, as I was looking through some of my snippets, that I should post some of it here. I know I write VERY sporadically and that's not ' good blogging practice'; I'm so tired all the time...
But there are some people out there, like I was, looking for something to read that will give them a sense of connection in the crazy world of single parent hood and I want to contribute. I rely on that connection also.

Post partum depression:
The first few months of motherhood are not what you think. From the moment my daughter first squawked, darkness crept in. It was dark in the hospital bed, dark in the shower, dark while I tried to get her to latch. I cried while trying to figure out the swaddle and hold her squirmy body in the sink. She chomped hard with her gums on my nipples, frustrated that I was only producing colostrum. She seemed to only lie still for momentary lapses.
I couldn’t relax, so I couldn’t sleep. I lied awake and stared at the ceiling and listened to the nurses chatter at their station and watched the clock tick. I felt alone.
Nurses came and gave me disapproving looks. Nobody offered to hold her.
I couldn’t walk. I couldn’t stand upright. I just wanted to rest. I didn’t get a proper rest until December of that year. She was born August 27.
For many,the first few months of motherhood aren’t cuddles, sleeping, eye gazing and giggles. It’s mainly frustration, anxiety and grief; particularly if you are going it alone.
Adjusting to a totally new way of life is frustrating.
Being responsible for another human being’s survival is anxiety building.
Realizing your life will never, ever, ever be as it was before is depressing.